Stress often gets a bad rap, but let’s be honest: it really does have its good points as well as the bad. After all, stress can light a fire under us, pushing us to meet deadlines, study for exams, or clean the house before guests arrive. This kind of stress—the good, old-fashioned “get stuff done” kind (very much the British way of life)—might even feel satisfying at times.
But lurking beneath this ‘productive’ surface often lies a deeper, more subtle form of stress; one often so quiet it exhausts your nervous system, sabotages your health, and keeps you stuck in unhealthy patterns. Often we are totally unconscious of it, as it lies deep within the subconscious.
The Conscious Stress – Let’s get stuff done..
On the surface, stress is what happens when you’ve got a to-do list that never gets any smaller. Maybe you’ve got a work deadline to meet, the dog just threw up on the carpet, and your best friend is texting you about their latest crisis. You feel the pressure, just under your skin, but you power through.
This kind of stress can actually be useful in small doses. It sharpens your focus, gives you a burst of energy, and gets the job done.
Let’s not forget however, even this “useful” stress can pile up over time, especially if you never truly take time out and relax. Sadly the majority of peoples’ idea of relaxing is scrolling through their phone whilst mindlessly eating – distraction after distraction – never really ever just being.
The Stress We Ignore: The Subconscious Saboteur
Now, let’s dig deeper. Beneath the obvious stress lies a subtler kind – which kicks in every time your subconscious runs the show (which is approximately 90% of the time). It is buried in your subconscious programs and is the stress you don’t even realise is running the show.
It stems from deeply ingrained beliefs and patterns—those nagging whispers in your mind that say things like:
- “I need to keep moving, or I’m not worthy.”
- “If I don’t do this perfectly, I’ll fail.”
- “Hurry up! You’ll never succeed if you slow down.”
These subconscious programs often come from past experiences, societal conditioning, or outdated survival mechanisms.
The worst part? These beliefs silently trigger your nervous system, keeping you in a low-level state of fight-or-flight—even when you’re just sipping tea or doing yoga. You might not notice it, but your body sure does. Over time, this kind of stress can lead to burnout, illness, and a constant feeling of unease.
When Stress Gets Sneaky: Compounding Triggers
Our energies become more tangled as once you’re operating from subconscious stress, even minor inconveniences can feel catastrophic. Imagine this scenario:
- You’re out for a run, ticking off another “productive” activity on your list.
- Deep down, you’re already stressed because you feel like you need to prove your worth by staying busy.
- Suddenly, someone steps into your path, forcing you to slow down.
What happens? You can feel a rising of injustice in the pit of your stomach. You feel frustrated, even irrationally so. That person has become the latest “trigger” for your already frayed nervous system. You tell yourself it’s about them, but it’s really about you—your subconscious belief that if you don’t keep moving, you’re not safe or worthy.
So after that joyful read – what can we do about it?
Basically by slowing down and realising that we truly are safe – even if we miss that deadline, or don’t get all our jobs done. Yes really!
I totally get that it can be scary to slow down, trust that we are safe, connect with our inner self and just be. Some people call it a Pandora’s Box – a box full of stuff that you never want to ever see or experience again because of the pain it caused the first time around. But remember, we carry that box around with us, day in and day out, and it just gets heavier and heavier. Ignoring it does not make it go away – ever.
That’s not to say you have to fling it open and deal with it – not at all.
We start our journey by filling ourselves up with self-love, self-belief and self-compassion (and yes that does mean being nice to yourself!), creating a foundation that is based on feeling safe and secure instead of fearful. This practice alone will start untangling energies and cause healthy shifts inside of us. Once we have that strong foundation, we can then start to slowly alchemise the energies that are being kept in that ‘Pandora’s Box’ – slowly and surely.
By making you a priority reconnect to your inner self; slow down, listen to your intuition, and address those deep-seated beliefs, something magical happens:
- You stop running on autopilot and start acting from a place of alignment.
- You feel calm, creative, and fully present.
- Life flows effortlessly, and you achieve your goals without forcing or stressing.
This isn’t about giving up on ambition or action. It’s about acting from a place of clarity and ease rather than stress and fear. When you’re in this state, your subconscious mind naturally helps you create what you focus on—no extra stress required.